Therapy? or Blog.
Today has been a day for the ages. My battle with my ex has been going flat out since my last post, and I have been holding off posting until we came to some sort of agreement. Guess again.
As you will note my title above, I’ve began to ponder if this blog is going to quickly become my therapy. As I sit here at my table writing this, I’m infuriated… I am a few short seconds from snapping… I’m hurt, and I’m dumbfounded.
If you’ve read my previous post you will remember that my lovely ex wouldn’t agree to 50/50. In fact, she was only agreeable to a slight increase in time.
Please remember.. she offered Every second weekend and every Monday. Got that in your head?? good… lets move forward.
I told her that I didn’t agree to that, and if she wasn’t going to agree to 50/50 then I would compromise and meet in the middle. Every second weekend, and every Monday and Tuesday… for now. And we will re visit this in a few months. We waited for her lawyers reply for about 5 days, finally my lawyer emailed…
She wasn’t agreeing.
Her offer you ask? Every second weekend, and every Second Monday.
Wait.. what?
Yup.. you read that right. She took a Monday off the table now. That’s no longer an option.
Although I wanted to be an ass.. I figured. Ok, ill play ball. Ill compromise some more.. I countered with her original offer. Every second weekend, and Every Monday. Lets sign this bad boy and get on with our lives.
Nope.
Not agreeable. What did she come back?? With no explanation at all… she comes back with ” Every second weekend, and Every Second Monday.
Again. I cant make this up.
Lets recap.
I asked for 50/50… she said no. Countered with every second weekend, and every Monday.
I countered with every second weekend, and every Monday and Tuesday… She said no, and then Countered with every second weekend, and every second Monday.
I countered with her original offer.. Every second weekend and Every Monday.
She said no, and countered with every second weekend and every second Monday. (yup her same offer)
My lawyer and I spoke, and enough is enough. We are going to move forward with a family court ordered assessment. The shitty thing about this assessment is that she still doesn’t have to agree to what is recommended.
So i sit here at 5:15… wondering where I have went wrong? I also begin to wonder, why is my family law system letting me down? She is making me question my ability to be a father… am I doing something wrong? What makes me such a horrible dad, that you refuse to let me see my kids more. Even one day per week more??
I often wonder if there is something I can do to bring awareness to what is going on the system when it comes to fathers. I’ve thought of many ideas, many ways I could have shit changed. But then reality sets in.
I’m one guy.
Long story short… .I’m not giving up. I don’t care what it costs… I don’t care if it takes me into bankruptcy. My kids deserve to see their father more.
I honestly believe that all kids should be able to see their father as much as their mother…. unless deemed unfit. I am not unfit.
I beg, plead, and urge you to share this with someone you know going through the same ordeal. I am here to talk.. I am here to listen… I’m here to help in any way possible.
Once again, I thank each and every one of you for reading this blog, for joining in my life’s trials and tribulations.
And mostly … for being my therapist.
thebarkingdad@gmail.com
One Response to “Therapy? or Blog.”
yesssss! I agree with you. Fight! Fight for your nuggets. My brother’s ex took his only daughter, moved states away. The little girl has had a rough life. He has to pay child support and yet gets no rights to see her. No holidays. No nothing besides to pay and he did nothing wrong. He really only loved her. He just didnt want to be with her mom andymore and the move was pissed off that a man really wouldnt want to be with her. Like wtf. The family court says they are working on it – its been 5 years. She is turning 15 this year. He has missed so many years and just been a piggy bank to the mom. The little girl only benefits from the money if we sneak her a gift card or cash here and there and we get it passed the mom without her knowing. He wasnt a dead beat dad either. But beings as she is 15 now – shoot its only 2 or 3 more years and it wont be the courts decision where she goes or the moms decision. At this point, might as well let the time play out instead asking the courts for anything cuz for real, they really didnt do anything. With all that said, I really do wish you luck! Hope your story ends different then my brothers.
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